No asshole with the new jersey plates You go @$ yourself. I’m fine just walking here in this crosswalk. I hope you ram into that truck one more time for good measure. You are the personification of pathetic behind the wheel. And your girlfriend was a skank.
“like a million” is rarely anything like a million at all. i think it’s usually more like five or six. or maybe only three.
when i was growing up my dad would always ask, “is this the most fun you’ve ever had?” of course it was usually when i was actually having the least fun i’d ever had, like riding in the car for three hours, waiting for my turn at the dentist, or being rescued out of a river that he made me ride my bike into.
i think this is how i developed that sarcastic muscle that is so very strong now. back then i’d always just nod and say, ”yeah dad this is literally the most fun i’ve ever had.” usually followed by something like, “i just love scientology. it’s the bees knees.”
tonight though, in one of my cooking classes that my husband so sweetly gave me for my birthday this year, i did actually have “the most fun i’d ever had.” and i’ll let you in on a little secret. it’s nice to not be sarcastic.
We didn’t meet here. But this is where you found me.
Then it was just you and me. And now look where we are.
i’ve started a new job. there are pros and cons.
here are the pros. i’ll list those. (i’m sure i’m missing a few, if not a dozen.)
i work with geoff. that is primo number one awesome greatness. this is geoff-geoff. he was in my wedding. i’ve known him since i lived in atlanta and have laughed until i damn-near-cried (read peed) on many occasion with. he really is one of my best friends. and now i work in the same building with him. what this means is this. coffee breaks: not only do i get coffee, i get geoff. and that’s a damn great thing.
second of all, well,l i love that i’m working with jaclyn. she’s a great partner and i can’t wait for her to get back from napa.
third of all i’m working for great bosses, one of which i worked for in the past and that’s a nice sense of calm.
and fourth of all, salads! the salads are terrific. you can choose your green, choose your toppings and even choose your chop. from coarse-chopped to completely obliterated. why would anyone trade the eateries of the west village for all the coarse chopped romaine in midtown? who needs blue ribbon deli’s delicious toasts, soups and roasted brussels sprouts? i figure their grapes are probably sour.